Okada' london how much????

*DEM SAY 'DEM SAY (PT I)
Awero: ojuelegba na how much??
Okada: na N500
Awero: say who die *hiss and moves away*
Okada: oya wait' how much u wan pay?
Awero: na N200 i get
Okada: okay enter' *gives her hellmet*
Awero: *snorts* dis ur helmet wey resemble back of pot, u dey wash am?
Okada: ahhh mama' na fashola o'
Awero: abegi' make i hear word jare' everithing na fashola' abi no be 4 una own good? if accident happen nko' no be dis helmet go save u??
Okada: mama' 4get dat one jare' no be today i begin drive 'machine
Awero: boya'lomo, jus carry me go where i tell u and i take God beg you' no speed o'
Okada: hahahahahahaha nothing do u mama' jus hold me tight'
Awero: ori'e
(The next morning)
Awero: *combs hair* omo' see as my hair dey cut o' wetin be dis??
*more hair comes off *egbami ' dat okadaman don kill me o' c all my hair for ground' yeeeeaa mami!! maammii!!

*DEM SAY 'DEM SAY (PT 2)
Vitus: my man' carry me go computer village
Okada: bros na N500
Vitus: come' if na play' stop am o' computer village e'baa; na N150 I enter am last week'
Okada: oga dat oone na last year' abi u neva hear say we don deyprovide helmet for passengers.
Vitus: wetin consign me wit dat one' na N160 i go pay' last.
Okada: oga i no go' na union price i give u
Vitus: *walks away* dis is rabbish!!
Okada: i nor go skool o'

*DEM SAY 'DEM SAY (PT 3)
Scholastica: *chewing gum* heyyy aboki' vee eye (v/island)
Aboki: pay N700
Scholastica: see ya mouth like 700; all dis mallam of yesterday; una don come open eye 4 lagos' na N300 i go pay.
Aboki: madam' i no be mo'llla o' oya put sumthing' u kno say hold-up plenty for road
Scholastica: ehen' na kuramo i dey go'
Aboki: ok enter; take ya helmet.
Scholastica: make dis ur jagajaga helmet no spoil my hair'
*after sum minutes*
Aboki: madam' we don dey reach kuramo
'Scholastica: (starts bleating) bea' bea' bea??
Aboki: *grinning* abi u nor wan come down?
Scholastica: bea'bea'bea * gestures with her hands pleadingly*
Aboki: dis ya 'breast go hear am today hahahahahahaha *zooms off*

Eyin temi' dos n many others are d kind of stories i ve been hearing since the FRSC mandated all motorcyle operators popularly called okada to use the crash helmet, tho i've not been able to verify any of the tori(s), it is not impossible (na 9ja we dey now) but dat is not our portion (Amen)
On my to work dis morning i saw one working class lady on okada holding her helmet above her head, as in she use her two hands hold am, n i began to wonder, wat if??????? how wld d helmet protect her?? abi dat na d latest style? cos u see guys doing same; even when the so-called helmets doesnt have straps.
Although i'm yet to use a helmet' (that is, i neva enter okada since dis year' (praise jah :p) i dont know how i going to wear the HELMET aka 'clement' on my head; (who sabi d kind ogor wey don wear am???) knowing how untidy sum of our okada men are. Dangote suggested buying me a crash hemlet but i REJECT am, abi na helmet him mates dey buy for der babes? him no kno where dem dey sell Rav 4 or X5 :)
Come to think of it, i wonder why there are no dispossable helmets' (as in u after u wear am finish u throway am) maybe its time sumone suggests it to the manufacturers (naughty eyes' wetin u feel??) b4 pesin go contract wetin no get name (since u CANNOT vouch 4 who had worn it)
Anoda interesting thing is the way our men in black are active' in arresting any defaulter, u go tink say na anoda thing dem dey find :) its all good sha' after all na part of their job' (shebi aloofaa??) Eko oni baje jare; Here's hoping IT lasts' cos sum of my 9ja pple sabi bend law to wetin suit dem.The FRSC has so far arrested 3,000 defaulters (na wa wa)

PS: Ehen as per dos dat kwalified to get my special hampers, nothing' nothing for una' cos none of you were able to decode the meaning of FOKASIBE; *shakes head* a whole blogville!!!! xcept for woomie who gets a ''HAM'' and uzezi who deserves a ''PER'' for been able to relate with it; SO diafor' ALL Hamper gifts have been suspended until further noticeeeeeee *grins*
until later
xoxoxo