Thursday, January 8, 2009

Okada' london how much????

Awero: ojuelegba na how much??
Okada: na N500
Awero: say who die *hiss and moves away*
Okada: oya wait' how much u wan pay?
Awero: na N200 i get
Okada: okay enter' *gives her hellmet*
Awero: *snorts* dis ur helmet wey resemble back of pot, u dey wash am?
Okada: ahhh mama' na fashola o'
Awero: abegi' make i hear word jare' everithing na fashola' abi no be 4 una own good? if accident happen nko' no be dis helmet go save u??
Okada: mama' 4get dat one jare' no be today i begin drive 'machine
Awero: boya'lomo, jus carry me go where i tell u and i take God beg you' no speed o'
Okada: hahahahahahaha nothing do u mama' jus hold me tight'
Awero: ori'e
(The next morning)
Awero: *combs hair* omo' see as my hair dey cut o' wetin be dis??
*more hair comes off *egbami ' dat okadaman don kill me o' c all my hair for ground' yeeeeaa mami!! maammii!!

Vitus: my man' carry me go computer village
Okada: bros na N500
Vitus: come' if na play' stop am o' computer village e'baa; na N150 I enter am last week'
Okada: oga dat oone na last year' abi u neva hear say we don deyprovide helmet for passengers.
Vitus: wetin consign me wit dat one' na N160 i go pay' last.
Okada: oga i no go' na union price i give u
Vitus: *walks away* dis is rabbish!!
Okada: i nor go skool o'

Scholastica: *chewing gum* heyyy aboki' vee eye (v/island)
Aboki: pay N700
Scholastica: see ya mouth like 700; all dis mallam of yesterday; una don come open eye 4 lagos' na N300 i go pay.
Aboki: madam' i no be mo'llla o' oya put sumthing' u kno say hold-up plenty for road
Scholastica: ehen' na kuramo i dey go'
Aboki: ok enter; take ya helmet.
Scholastica: make dis ur jagajaga helmet no spoil my hair'
*after sum minutes*
Aboki: madam' we don dey reach kuramo
'Scholastica: (starts bleating) bea' bea' bea??
Aboki: *grinning* abi u nor wan come down?
Scholastica: bea'bea'bea * gestures with her hands pleadingly*
Aboki: dis ya 'breast go hear am today hahahahahahaha *zooms off*

Eyin temi' dos n many others are d kind of stories i ve been hearing since the FRSC mandated all motorcyle operators popularly called okada to use the crash helmet, tho i've not been able to verify any of the tori(s), it is not impossible (na 9ja we dey now) but dat is not our portion (Amen)
On my to work dis morning i saw one working class lady on okada holding her helmet above her head, as in she use her two hands hold am, n i began to wonder, wat if??????? how wld d helmet protect her?? abi dat na d latest style? cos u see guys doing same; even when the so-called helmets doesnt have straps.
Although i'm yet to use a helmet' (that is, i neva enter okada since dis year' (praise jah :p) i dont know how i going to wear the HELMET aka 'clement' on my head; (who sabi d kind ogor wey don wear am???) knowing how untidy sum of our okada men are. Dangote suggested buying me a crash hemlet but i REJECT am, abi na helmet him mates dey buy for der babes? him no kno where dem dey sell Rav 4 or X5 :)
Come to think of it, i wonder why there are no dispossable helmets' (as in u after u wear am finish u throway am) maybe its time sumone suggests it to the manufacturers (naughty eyes' wetin u feel??) b4 pesin go contract wetin no get name (since u CANNOT vouch 4 who had worn it)
Anoda interesting thing is the way our men in black are active' in arresting any defaulter, u go tink say na anoda thing dem dey find :) its all good sha' after all na part of their job' (shebi aloofaa??) Eko oni baje jare; Here's hoping IT lasts' cos sum of my 9ja pple sabi bend law to wetin suit dem.The FRSC has so far arrested 3,000 defaulters (na wa wa)

PS: Ehen as per dos dat kwalified to get my special hampers, nothing' nothing for una' cos none of you were able to decode the meaning of FOKASIBE; *shakes head* a whole blogville!!!! xcept for woomie who gets a ''HAM'' and uzezi who deserves a ''PER'' for been able to relate with it; SO diafor' ALL Hamper gifts have been suspended until further noticeeeeeee *grins*
until later

Monday, January 5, 2009


That 2009 will be a year of :
*Manisfestation of God's supernatural blessings in her family
*Greater achievements & experiences in her career.
*Restoration and fruitfulness in her body, soul and spirit
*And above all' Unlimited Grace
as you type in ur Amen' May it also be well with u and your family

Yessoooo0 2008 is gone and can Never come back Not even as a Remix, We give Glory to God for everything Esp' the fact that you can Still view dis Blog '
who says this is not a Miracle??????
We hope 2009 ll be a year of testimonies even for our country 9ja; Heres praying for better governance and an end to boju-boju politricks.

Hope u all had a lov'ly christmas, Lagos was as usual lagos and everywhere u go na fokasibe u go hear' ori'e fokasibe, danfo fokasibe, Arsenal fokasibe Abeg wat is fokasibe???? (FBA/XSN ova to una) talking of agberos' i nor kno wetin to buy for my 'Agbero' as xmas gift o' the bobo don try for urs truly no be small, anytime wey he see me for cms na free ride to kilimanjaro be dat, another thing i gbadu abt him is dat he is neat and not rough unlike his oda colleagues as in' he goes abt his duties quietly and diligently, i have not seen him fight with any driver or conductor neither have i caught him smoking dat thing tho his lips tells a different story entirely But above all he calls me mamma' (who dey jealous??
So make una suggest wetin i go buy for my 'Agbero' who coincidentally bears a name that starts wit 'A and ends with O'
P.S: I no want suggestions like 'boxers' or singlet' b4 d bobo go begin tink say i get hidden agenda o :)

In the spirit of celebrating 2009ja, the first 9 commenters gets special hampers from LG'

Happy New Yeah'