TGIF: did u see my phone???

James (my colleague) got to the office this morning in his jeans and prada top, 30mins later he realized he couldnt find his phone; he came to my office n the following conversation ensued;
James: o baby, nawa o' i no see my 4one again
Lg: how manage?? u sure say u no leave am 4 haus?????
James: No, i even use am receive call for cms b4 i enta bus
Lg: Cee gini???
James: cms naa!
Lg: *grinning* aaaaaah no wonda, i see ur 4one jare
James: *amazed* you sure?? for where?????
Lg: for cms naa
James: *smiling* thank very much, where 4 cms???
Lg: you kno dat place where dem dey enter 'ajah bus, e get one lonnnnnnnnng pole wey dey dia, na on top d pole i see ur 4one
James: *doubtful* El'gee u sure?????
Lg: ofcof!! infact d 4one just dey dia dey cry' 'james o jamess oo but i nor kno say na ur 'james' be dat; pele o.

*shior* yeye dey smell, who nor sabi say dem no dey bring out 4one for cms? (esp when u wan drag enter public transport) boyoyo no soji at all Haba!!! *shakes head* d phone don enta voice-mail, but if him dey lucky, dem fit re-sell am 4 am for under bridge for 5k (d 40ne is worth 30bay). He was my 2nd colleague dat had his phone stolen at cms, the other guy got to the office with a new green ear piece (e resemble xmas lite) minus d blackberry he bought 2wks ago (dat one' pesin go begin dey speak patua:-)

I remember the first time my 4one was stolen/borrowed, it was 'may 29 2007 during the inauguration of d present lagos state governor (BRF) at tafawa balewa square, i was on my way to ikoyi with a male friend to drop my cv wit one of his other male friend; since the day (aka black tuesday) had being declared a public holiday, we decided to go thru cms (thinking d road wld be free of traffic; By the time we got to race course the ceremony had already ended and many AC supporters (garbed in the inaugural ankara) were trooping out, we were stil discussing the loss of DPA's jimi agbaje when they started robbing vehicles on the road, when it got to our turn, the boy just carry my bag begin dey go...... WETIN??????? na so i begin shout, 'my cv, my cv! he took my ceevee!! ' My fear fear friend held my hand and told me not to worry, FOR WHERE???? na so i begin the open door, nee jst grabbed me, begin beg me say 'lg abeg o, abi u wan die??? dat boy don smoke igbo' him even carry gun' EHEN??? 'make him collect d money, drop my bag na', my cries fell on deaf ears as he held on to me tight till they all left (others brandishing knives n all even came to re-check if they had 4gotten to take sumn'till date i still cringe wherever i m in dat vicinity.
PS: The next day 'nee replaced everything including MY CV:-)
PSS: Bros Fash, if you are reading dis, u still owe me a brand new NOKIA ----- (make i no lie' na nokia 2650 :-)

The 2nd time was also in a car, i was with dangote' at harbour works bustop along ikorodu road; there was traffic (as usual) the next thing we heard a loud noise close to d car, looked out n saw a young man pointing to the tyres, thinking the tyres had burst' dangote wind down And we saw ourselves looking at a black/brown/red/blue thing (maybe na biro/spanner/plier but we no need confirmation, we just surrender our 4ones (d only thing he asked for) if una see as dangote dey shiver????? u rememba dat 'shan george/orange drug advert' dat shaky shaky daddy one, yelz' na so :-)
PS: This one happened few days after 'nee replaced the first 4one

The 3rd time was at *drum roll* OSHODI, lets just say i walked into a ram-fight and the rest like they say in oyinbo film is history :-) but eyin temi after dos hypertension-threatening incidents (and seriessssss of prayas and fastn) i don dey shine my eyez like scofield' (esp when i dey dos area wey omo boiz dey run things) i carry my 4one in a pouch, infact let me give u a HINT on how to recognize me (woomie hope u r reading); look out for a fine yellow chic sporting a 'gallas and ALWAYS wearing a black pouch on her wrist at #%#% every morning by 9.00 am or 5 ' o clock in the evening.
PS: If una go harass innocent pesin wey tanda him own for bustop.........'you are on ur own o :-)

**NAIJA BLOGGERS AWARD UPDATE**
If YOU have already voted but DIDNT vote for LADYGUIDE, u berra go to a cafe NOW n correct ur MISTAKE; forget fba's threats, na today?????? e don tey wey nyansh get centre-parting jare, NORRIN DEY HAPPEN !!!!

Have a fabulous w'end