Tuesday, September 9, 2008

..... and he caressed me

I have been harassed 3 times..

The Ist time was when i was in j.s.s2 and had recently started sprouting dem breasts tho’ they were more like small oranges :) it was the era of bra tops and I had lots of colors to choose from (thanx to mumsy) On dat fateful afternoon i was on my way to see my classmate who hadn't come to school.The journey was rather un-eventful, till I felt a hand on my breast; it was the man sitting beside me; He slowly began touching me but i didn’t shout, cry...... nothing; the assault continued till we got to the last bus stop n he quickly got down n disappeared, as in when i got down, i couldn’t find him; the funny thing was dat nobody noticed n even if they did, no one say anything. I continued my journey to my friend’s place n didn’t tell her or any person wat happened (wat could they have done?) i didn’t know the perv's name or where he resides; i couldn’t even remember wat he looked like; But looking back on dat incident.. asides the fact dat i am a shy person, i stil cant explain why I didn’t scream my head off; maybe i was in shock or na jazz :)

The 2nd time: The culprit was sonny spaco (a mad man dat lived in my neighborhood) it wasn’t serious o’ before una begin hyper ventilate; he was only doing wat he knows how to do best….. which was to touch other people’s breast, but mehn no be small thing o’ i jst tank God say no be only me sha! It wasnt too long after the first incident, 3 of my friends (classmates) had followed me home; after gisting n entertaining dem wit con'des and rondo-rondo, we all left my house to visit another classmate, as we got to the bus stop, a man appeared in front of us, before we could shout 'whoiberat?!?!?!' He begin press our breast(s) pium! pium! pium! pium! like door bell, eyin temi' una need to see how we pick race, the next day at school i apologise tire b4 dem go say i set dem up :)

The 3rd time, It was during my 2nd year in school, i was on my way to visit my friend (toria) she resides in ikotun-egbe, she had given me the addy but 4got to tell me dat i have to take a bike (okada) to her house, na so i stop one okada, only for the driver inform me dat he carries two passengers, instead of me to double the price so he can take me alone, na so i tanda dey for wait the 2nd passenger, a man finally came n after haggling wit the driver, sat behind me. the driver had only driven for some mins, when the passenger behind me began to mumble and gyrate as in.....up & down, up & down' omo' i cldnt move, which kind winchy be dis?? i just began to pray dat toria's house wasnt far, i think d driver noticed the action, bcos he stopped driving n asked the man to get down, to come down nko? na anoda tori, the driver had to force him down. It was when we had gotten to toria's house dat d driver warned me neva to share a bike wit other passengers esp men *loud hiss* good samaritan, why him no tell me before shior! But after dat incident, i became very harsh as in, if anybody... weda man/woman/boy/girl conciously or otherwise touch my kini, i dey nearly kill d pessin wit bad eye *grins* the tactics had been working for me until....

Dat that friday evening, i had boarded a bus 4rm Ajah going to obalende though my destination was TBS, It was one of dos unusual days when there was no traffic, we had gotten the the civic centre when i felt a hand caressing my thigh, i screamed or rather shouted yeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaa!! (dis one pass ouch!! o) and raised my legs, my first thought was 'it's a dog or cat’ but how come??’ by dis time the driver had parked n everyone was starring at me, i looked behind n saw one bolo looking at me one kind, na so i give him am Gbosaiii'

'U no dey fear, u no dey fear, u touch me’ i stammered, standing up.

He held his face with one hand n pushed me wit d other,

‘Eh u push me’ as i my raised my umbrella to hit him, the condor held my hand

‘Leave me' i screamed 'i must wound dis goat 2day, shey u no dey fear’, i fumed

‘U nor fit do anything, i touch u?’ the bolo asked

So u still get mouth ehn, i go show u today, useless man’ i screamed

‘Sistah, e don do' abeg forgive am' some passengers began pleading;

‘Make una no beg me o' 'i mus deal wit am', i retorted, 'driver make we dey go'

The journey continued and i began strategizing, i didnt want the bolo to go scot free, i wld luv to hand him over to the police (at least he go chop beating) and i kno the police headquarter (zone 2) was close to the bus stop i was to alight, but if the bolo was going to obalende, how can i single handedly drag him out of the bus???? but my people, mathew 7:7 proved itsef o, cos bolo then informed the conductor that he was alighting at onikan (the same bus stop i was to alight) omo una need to see how i begin shine ma' teeth :)

We finally got to onikan, i alighted and began look for any uniformed officer around before the bolo runs away but as soon as he came down i heard

'Aunty sorry, abeg no vex na d.......' i walked off b4 he finished talking


Afrobabe said...

Na lie!!!!!

Afrobabe said...

I say na lie....you owe me a big fat FIRST present!!!!

LG said...

norrin do u jare'
werrin u want???? *bats lashes*

Afrobabe said...

Haaaa...I am still in shock...so as soon as I think of pressie I will return to inform you...keep ur cash close by..

Lmao…wonder what he wanted to say….na the short skirt?

LG said...

AFRO wit which leg????
i dont wear short things o *winks*

mizchif said...

I know it is only Afro that will comment 4 times, 5 mins after a post has been put up.
I'm sha 2nd, lemme go and read.

aloted said...

men reading this..made me laff and uncomfortable at the same time...some men are just perverts...

so i didnt get the end of ur story o..thnk i am havin a slow dey...lol..u ended it to abruptly..lol

mizchif said...

Eiya, @ least he apologised.
Na wa o, i've never had any such "encounters" myself. Maybe dem dey look face.

So Lg, we may have even boarded a bus from Ajah together & never known it, cuz dat Ajah-CMS na my route and na bus i dey enter b4.

Please lemme jus tell u one funny incident that happened on one of those bus rides.
One mumu woman was sleeping, next thing she jumped awake and started to find her fone. She immediately accused d lady sitting beside her.
Snatched d ladys bag & started searching, while calling her names.

mizchif said...

ppl inside d bus asked d mumu woman to flash her fone, omo d woman no even sabi d number.
I think the bus was still moving sef.
Next thing the womans fone started ringing, guess where it was......
inside her cloth!!! Yeeeeeeeeeeeee
If u see d correct abara, d lady she was harrasing used to design her face ehn, b4 ppl started to beg for the woman.

I wan laff die for dat bus.

mizchif said...

ppl inside d bus asked d mumu woman to flash her fone, omo d woman no even sabi d number.
I think the bus was still moving sef.
Next thing the womans fone started ringing, guess where it was......
inside her cloth!!! Yeeeeeeeeeeeee
If u see d correct abara, d lady she was harrasing used to design her face ehn, b4 ppl started to beg for the woman.

I wan laff die for dat bus.

Woomie O! said...

yeah, this afrobabe sef!!! running naked around blogville. lol.
so, I'm second!!! yippie!!!
been harrased more than three times o...thing is, I know many jerks at school who brush my breasts on purpose...one day, I gave them all a piece of my mind.
Gawd! I hate it when strangers touch me.

Woomie O! said...

oh! sorry THIRD!

Woomie O! said...

oh! sorry FOURTH!!

LG said...

ALOTED: iyawo so na me u dey take laff?? no wahala sha' cos i don talk say any pessin wey touch my 'kini'must'lose' him own 'kini', at worst dem go show my face for tevee *wide grin*

MIZCHIF: lolllllllll@ abara but
o'gal, how d woman take 4get her nos. abi na shock?? :) :)
*werrin dey??

WOOMIE: aah babes, sum boiz na touching breast wit style be their speciality, i kukuma sabi slap welkl well, rabbish!!! *grins*
how u ????

Afrobabe said...

ok...I got it....na devil cause am..

who is beefing my 45 comments when I haven't even finished????

DiAmOnD hawk said...

wow... to say I'm shocked at all these encounters is an understatement... the boldness of it all... I amazed... I hope this never happens to you again

LOL @ mizchif's story

fluffycutething said...

All sorts wey person dey see for this Lagos sef. 1 man rubbed my butt in a bus once,i didn't utter a word because it was dark and d bus looked like "one chance".I had entered it before i realised it was only men in d bus!!!!

Babes better stick to entering(was almost going to type WEARING-like a typical Yoruba person abi?)BRT buses LOL

Anonymous said...

i swear it sounds like a home video.
what nonsense! at least you wozzed the fool small sha. idiat.

aloted said...

@LG- at all ...wasn't laffing at you..was laffing at how u described it...i find the act of men behaving like that disgusting..

meanwhile before i forget my url has changed: http://alotedbabe.blogspot.com

Red Sapphire said...

I couldn't just stop laughing when i read this post...its was funny...plus the drama that followed with u and the bolo...thank God he apologized.
I dont think he was a perv..he was just trying his luck...olodo.
my dad has a house @ ikotun egbe, i hate the biking stuff..annoys me..whether man or woman..cant allow them sit behind me.
Was a good laff ....una dey try for lagos.

Anonymous said...

in the short time it took me to read, 4 comments have bn added. na wa o

this was funny to read. I dont think I can live in Lagos o especially if I have to deal with the jerks on buses. I never sit in the middle of two men on a bike o, I learned that when I was around last time. I make the other guy sit behind the driver and I sit at the back.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the update....and so so funny, How are you sweets?

LG said...

AFRO: hehehehehehehehehehehehehe
babes abeg no vex *grins*

DIAMOND HAWK: Amii o dear, but i wonder if the bolo xpected me to keep quiet' *hiss*
thanx jare,
take kia

FLUFFY:iyawo, i dont wear okro-tops
esp to the office, i was wearing shirt n pants (as usual) and it wasnt transparent at all
as per BRT, they r not save o, i boarded one yesterday u need to see how dem pack us like sardine *sigh* d whole thing tire me sef.
Howz the fam?

GEISHA: babes dis one pass homevideo o, but d kind slap i give am ehn' i sure say 'ijaw pple ' go need to massage am 4 am, rabbish!! lolll
*How u?

ALOTED: no wahala u are very free to laf, oya...hehehehehehehehe lol
but why u change ur addy, was it becos i called u foine gal in dat... post *bats lashes*
lollllllllll norrin do u jare'

RED SAPPHIRE: luck ke??? him no dey look face???????????? *hiss*
ssoo u know ikotun, my friend stas at abaranje n there was no way i cld have trekked to her house' but d kind lambasting i give her dat day ehn *grins*
*welcome to my blog, hope u ll be back

IWALEWA: *sigh* i dont blame u dear' dos pervs are everywhere... the funny thing was dat he apologise but watttt possessed him'
lagos na wawawa :)
*its been a while, hope all is well

KINSHAR: i m doing fabulously well honey, double thanx muuuuaaaahhhh

princesa said...

LG nwannem...u no go kill me.

you know the part i loved best?
where u gave him one sound abara,lol!
I almost died if laughter at that point.

useless pervs. them plenty for public transpots o,dats why i had to put my kobos together to buy my hummer jeep(i wish),lol!

Free-flowing Florida said...

nne, abeg make i come back tomorrow come read dis post. my head dey knack as me & u dey here so

Ms.O said...

LMAO!!! Only in Nigeria!!!! this girl na wa ooo, only you all this toshing things !!! A HOT SOMBORI!!!! I am vexing for you. can u believe I was here earlier today. and there was nothing..hisssssssss!!!

LG said...

PRISCO: lolllll d abara shock me sef, na transfer of all the other 'touchery' wey him gang don commit :)
but no be lie u talk o, time don reach 4 me to buy moto' *bats lahes*
how mush u go contribute :)
*Hope the SBR's preparation is going on smoothly

FFF: awww ndo' dear
hope u don take para...

MS.O: abeg sweeri no vex for me o,
pele sho'gbo??
BTW so na bcos i HOT naim make dem dey 'tosh' my kini shebi??
i no even kno weda u dey flatter or console me sef *grins*

Femi B said...

Wow...very eventful life...and people say there are no pedophiles in naija...imagine small girl like you..
I got so excited when you showed that bolo.. infact me sef i dey punch the air for my computer when i was reading the story.

musco said...

i simply admire d boldness wit which u have shared this wit us.

really nice to know u learnt ur lesson & planned to deal effectively with d last guy.

we really have some mad guys who go crazy when they see anything in skirt!

LG said...

FEMI B: lol@ i dey punch the air thanx hon, norrin do u
*as per pedophile, they r everywhere o, i remember catching one baba like dat stroking his daughter's kini, she was stil a todler, he just positioned her on his lap *sigh*
me sef no too kno anything then' na tales by moonlight i go watch.
only God can save us 4rm ourselves

MUSCO: yeeeso i learnt my lesson the hard way *sigh*
but its all in the past, now na 'operation touch me, i touch u' Lg dey do *wide grin*
as per, men dat can resist anything in skirt... na only God fit save dem.
*Thanx bro, hope u r doing well
take kia

Original Mgbeke said...

LG, you be badoski babe mayne. A girl after my own heart...i say speak up or take action, dont sit there and let these old perverted mofokys touch you anihow. I mean, e be laik day dem no dey fear again o..abi George bush don start to dey climb Okada? *Hissssss*

In my head and around me said...

This reminds of being in P/H and needing to take a bike. They would always insist on two passengers and on any normal day I would pay double the fare and enjoy my ride in peace. A few times when they were scarce I would be sandwiched between 2 men. Bike rider and man passenger. Until I started refusing. If a man gets on, I insist on seating behind. They abused me tire but I no gree.

Funny post. Pium pium pium!

Jarrai said...

Lg..maybe your boobies are very fine...ok ok i dey joke

Those men, na wa for them, what can a women do, you can't even enter public transport anymore. Good thing you made noise for that man on the bus...

I couldn't help laughhing tho!!!

How are you??

Uzezi said...

shit happens all the time, especially in buses in this Lagos

FineBoy Agbero said...

Guy dat touched ur sprouters? Dat was me!

Dude dat pretended to be mad and did d pium-pium thing(my Gawd dat was funny!)? Dat was me!

The real craze-man 4 ikotun? no be me be dat o!

Thigh rubber? Me, of course!

Now, u know where u've met me!

good samaritan, why him no tell me before shior!
Because u were being stingy!

Toluwa Lase said...

why dey always got to blame everything on the devil...mehn, i pity those people who wld go to hell, cos the devil gonna increase their own fire specially for blaming him uneccesarily...

lol@ the post though!

Mz. Dee said...

na wow o!!!!!

Babe.. i thank god say u do sumthing!! I thot u go begin yarn one rubbish of violation and goin home to cry.. 3 gbosa 4 u!!!!!!

NigerianDramaQueen said...

Whish kind tapping of current be that one
The kind sound wey I for sound am eh!
How hav u been LG?

isha said...

Wow! Some experiences. Thank God it hasn't been worse o. But you look like you got ur own. people go fear you...

Kafo said...

na wa ooo
i think i just blocked out all of those tapping current memories of back in the day

life is something oo

LG said...

ORIGINAL MGBEKE: lollll@badoski,
but babes no be lie u talk o, i m thinking of buying a pocket knife :)
hope u r doing well

IN MY HEAD N AROUND: naaawaaao *claps hand* even for pooracourt?? i tot it was only lagos dat style existed' but even if u be d only passenger dos yeye okada men go dey enter pothole so ur body go dey rub dem :) :)
me sef don tire.

JARRAI: lolll na u sabi o' for ur info.. my cup size is &%^*%@$&
(gudluck, decoding it)*wide grin*
*i m doing fabulously well thanx n u??? hope u better now'

UZEZI: u can say dat again dear, but not only in buses, it goes on in our schools, market, church, offices, even in our homes' i kno of an 'uzezi' dat got disvirgined by her dad (i kid not)
God save us'

FINE-BOI-AGBERO: lolllll na today??
e don tey wey nyansh get centre-parting' *grins*
i kno say u be 'ogbologbo'
but come try me now' i go make sure say i cut ur 'aso rock' yeye'
*u have been warned, :):)

naijalines said...

Sista, I'm so sorry this happened to you. No be joke o. Thanks for sharing. I hope writing about it has helped you put it in the back drawer.

The first one sounded really creepy, it made my skin crawl. I can only imagine how U must have felt...it's disgusting.

Still, you be fine sista. Keep smiling jare, norrin do you:-)

naijalines said...

BTW, I'm back o!

30+ said...

LG, honestly did this really happen to you?!

Spaco - lmao

Please don't kill me with laughter...LG how do you get to have funny experiences like this

simeoneomobaba said...

there are alot of sick people/ ailments out there that medical science cant address..
good thing you acted..

doll said...

This men are just perverts. I have been harassed a couple of times but none has gone scot free. One of dem have razor blade marks thanx 2 my popc. D oda 2 dirty slaps in quick concession and d 3rd a flying kick

LG said...

TOLUWASE: lolllll no mind dem, everytime na de... dem kill na de... dem steal na de... which ones de... no dey cause *hiss*
*swerri hope u r gud*

MZ.DEE: violation ke? werrrrrin consign me with dat one?? i make sure i violated him face sef' :):):)
nansense!! dem no get mouth na

9JADRAMAQUEEN: Babes na so i see am o' all these end-time-children wey no dey fear pessin (hiss)
*i'm fine o'jare, na only hunga (wide grin)

ISHA: O gal, me sef clap for mysef'
but how can one boi abi na man wey no fit wash hiim 'private' tink say him fit just touch me *hiss* i deserve award 4 dat slap sef, :):)
*Hope u r doing well, how'z popsi?

KAFO: na real wa' but the funny thing was dat some of d yeye men in the bus was grumbling dat 'i shldnt have slapped him like dat'
u need to see d kind eye wey i look dem , raabbish!! :):)

LG said...

9JALINES: thanx honey, its in d past now but the funny thing was dat, i didnt feel anything when 'he' groped me repeatedly in the bus, i stil dont kno why' maybe twas bcos i was wearing my bra-top lollll newayz i m sure God has dealt wit him 4 me :)

30+: hehehehehe my sistah i no kno o' abi na my face? or my voice? or my erm.....ermmmm u kno na (grins)
*Hope u r doing well

SIMEON-OMOBABA: yaaaay thanks, i actually tot u wld complain d slap was too HAWTT!!! *wide grin*
norrin do me shebi????? :)

DOLL:lolllllllllllll@ flying kick,
O gal abeg come teach me, u neva kno wen it might come in handy :) n yep its soooo sad dat some of these pervs dont get caught

Omotee! said...

na wa for Bolo and associates o! i like as u slap am sha, if na anoda chic, na english she for dey speak, but as u be correct lag chic....
one man don try am with me too, d man old reach my papa o, e con touch my thigh, close to my gan gan! come see as i scratch am! of cos he talk say na devil, were, agbaya!

when will i ever be first sef?!
afrobabe, i hate u, must u be first?!!!!!!

archiwiz said...

Hmmm....The title just made me go cold. Thank goodness they weren't worse.

Twix! said...

kai, i for show am. The idiot, i wont let him go scot free o. They are the ones that touch little children. Nonsense!!!

Twix! said...

kai, i for show am. The idiot, i wont let him go scot free o. They are the ones that touch little children. Nonsense!!!

LG said...

OMOTEE: lolll@correct lag chic, omo i gats to 'shine my eye' if not 'dem go commot my bra i nor go kno':):)
*How ur side? hope o'wapa'

ARCHIWIZ: ahhh dearie, thank God o ' i even got to wrk late dis morning' cos i was busy checking out the passengers dat was entering in the bus dat ply my route,i no trust dem o :):)

TWIX: lollllll o girl, e be like u be 'power mike' o or u for take drag d man down 4rm bus?? *grins*
norrin do u sha'(me) i just pray i dont bump into dem again, if not na teeveee una go see the story :)

Standtall said...

Dont let me start another topic on this. I am looking for that electric thing women carry abroad cos I want to be using it

LG said...

MUMMY GARFIELD: which electric thing be ratt??????

Dee! said...

Some men are simply SICK! Haba! I think (seriously) such perverts should be castrated! Yeye men! I hope say you slap that last one well well!

How are you!

Esmeralda said...


na so u take all the vex of the first three offenders come put am on the bolo's head!lol

LG, na only u biko!

Aijay said...

Babe, this is the funniest post I've read today.

May God save us in this crazy world.

Allied said...

I actually did not find this post funny like everyone else. i am sitting here fuming and wishing i was there to help you hit the Stupid bolo of a goat.

Are u really serious? other passengers did not chastise him for you? OMG! what has this country turned into? I would have used my umbrella, my shoes, my bag - so that next time - he will think about it twice...

LG said...

DEE: na castrate u call am?? i say make dem ‘chop’ their kini comot, the annoying thing be say most of dem na old papas but Lg no dey look face o, any attempt... na Gbosai *hiss*
*dearie, hope u r o.k, its been a while.

ESMERALDA: Babes if na u nko??? Abeg no dulling again i don quiet reach :)
*my b4’b4 partner, how ur side??

AIJAY: Amii o’
(yeye gal' afta u don laff me finish')

ALIED GENESIS: Thank you jare my sistah' with women like (us) those bolos 4 don stop dat rubbish tey tey *hiss*

Parakeet said...

LG...this is so funny. It happened to me once on the bus. I didnt keep quiet the first time it happened. I just wozed the guy and people were wondering wot happened. He couldnt say jack! Dirty peoples!

Writefreak said...

Real shio, the last idiot was actually going to say na the devil, goat!Would have done the same girl, thumbs up!

LG said...

PARAKEET: yessoo chop knuckle jare' no slackin' na wetin fit dem be dat' yeye ppl

WRITEFREAK: *hiss* no mind am d bolo jare' why devil no come defend am'
BTW: swerri how u? Oga nko?

ibiluv said...

bolo deserved the slap

QMoney said...

hahaha,bt true true,u for call police??e easy like dat?i need thr contacts oh..even lastma connection sef

rebecca said...

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Full of the light,

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Whiter than snow,

Waving so flower-like

When the winds blow!

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Rushing in spray,

Happy at midnight,

Happy by day.

Ever in motion,

Blithesome and cheery,

Still climbing heavenward,

Never aweary;

Glad of all weathers,

Still seeming best,

Upward of downward

Motion thy rest;

Full of a nature

Nothing can tame,

Changed every moment

Ever the same.

Ceaseless aspiring,

Ceaseless content,

Darkness or sunshine

Thy element;

Glorious fountain!

Let my heart be

Fresh, changeful, constant,

Upward like thee!

~~~by runescape gold

ejura said...

lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!lol!...I've lost the ability to type anything else!lol!lol!lol!lol!kai! Ladyguide! This your guidance heavy!

Buttercup said...



nawa o!


chai, i wud never wanna step on ur toes o..lol..

kay-shawn said...

BTW, who is a bolo?

Dee! said...

O gal you have won an award! Check my blog for details!

rayo said...

thunder fire all of them. mehn if u c the eyes i walk wit when i have to take pub transport, devil sef go take cover.

AlooFar said...

I dey laff O.

RE: Thanks, nothing do me O!
I hope dem no sack u.

I'm getting there.

badderchic said...

scary but funny actually not funny at all, sheet, Im rambling, how did I get to be 73? sob sob

Sabira said...

wow, its very sad how many young girls in nigeria get molested and keep their mouths shut about it because either no one will believe them or people would even ask them to hush about it. lol@the guy begging at the bus stop, shameless men!

Red Sapphire said...

You've got an award ladyguide,
Follow the link...
Enjoy!!!!plus i like ur blog.

Writefreak said...

my sister, been under the weather na why you no see my brake light! Will be back in full force once i feel brand new! Thanks love..mwah! any other way i can contact you aside here?

rethots said...

na what???

tobenna said...

LG, I swear, you be nutcase.
Complete one oh.
Ah ah.
Nice read as usual.

Onome said...

fcukkkk!!!!! dats terrible to hear....so sorry u went through all dat

AnyaPosh said...

hahaha... wetin the 3rd guy for talk? 'na d...' what??? haha. useless. na so dem go dey maltreat pesins just becos dem get penis, we no go hear word. abeg!