Tuesday, August 19, 2008

CONGRATS TO 9JA + MY FACE-LIFT

9ja... dis na 9ja...
9ja.... i dey gbadu 9ja oo....( x3)

4 big gbosas!! 4 the 'dream team' jare, gbosa! gbosa!! gbosa!!! gbosa!!!!

9ja, we too 'mush' (now repeat after me) we too 'mush' *grins*
but seriously, i owe dos bois plenty shepe o!! esp nsofor, anichebe, obasi, van zekin, obinna n my osaze, ohhh osaazz, see ya eye, ya ear, ya teeth, ya leg, ya ...... n ya....... (sb tweaks Lg ) *lol*
yesso!!! we proved it today n ll do so again come saturday at the finals.
(i just hope 'lionel merci' contracts jedi-jedi friday nite sha) *evil grin*

Haba!!! E nor easy o!!, since Olumpic (according to our mallam) start, 9ja neva win (not even 1/2 ) Gold medal, a whole giant of africa, the bois kno Lg wont have dat else, they' be 4gotten in china, *lol*
but sum 9gerians are funny o, everybodi wan represent; after d match i started hailing everybodi in the office, *up 9ja! we trashed 'em*; i come carry my kurukere leg go meet our GM (gate man),
' baba, 9ja too mush o, shebi u watch d match?' i asked, and he replied,
'sisi mi, why not, i watching it na, see all the goals wey papilo score?? dat boyz sabi play o' in my head "huh??? 4 where baba see kanu??? was it 4rm his kchibo radio???", lolllllllll
Norrin do us sha!!! WE WON!! :)

Now, abt how i got my face-lift;
I went to see my sistah (a friend actually), after chilin with her n her daughter(very cute gal) She told me she was looking for a house-help n wants to enlist the help of an agency, but the only problem was dat, she doesnt kno if she shld ask for a male or female help, she asked for my opinion n i began to sing 'palava u dey find, palava u go get it oooo'
(in other words, 4get it) shocked, she asked why? n i told her .....

*U wake up by 8am one morning (already late for wrk), runs into the bathroom, u r abt to hang ur towel, when u see Red (yes a red) shikili g-string hanging on the shower rack, knowing ...
(1) U dont own/wear one,
(2) Its just u, hubby, ur 2yrs old daughter and..... risi ur house-help
U madly walks (runs) to risi's room with d 'offensive garment'. U find her sleeping n shouts at her, 'Risi! Risi! c'mon wake, cant u hear me? get up!!', U hit her not too gently on d back, 'My friend c'mon wake up', she opens her eyes and non nonchalantly looks at u, this infuriates u more n u scream at her "who is the owner of this..... this thing!!, i saw hanging in the bathroom..... my bathroom!!????
Risi looks at the g-string, takes it 4rm u n examines it (she nearly smell am sef) then loudly exclaim, shaking her head. 'Madam no be my own, i nor kno who get am, even sef u fit ask oga, him kno say i nor dey wear pant!! ( hehehehe Ebenebe!!! na LG get am *hiss*)

OR

*U r bathing ur daughter on sunday morning, whilst playing n asking her questions abt her friends/teachers in school, u finish washing her 'kini' but just to be sure there r no poop hiding hiding *grins* u begin to probe with ur fingers, When suddenly ur daughter exclaims, 'oohhhh Mommy!!!! you are doing what uncle-okon (house help) use to do to me........ skip!!!
Eyin temi, i neva even finish d tory before my friend give me 'Gbaun!!'
una see me see wahala??, abi nor be she ask for my opinion?????? *sigh*
Newayz, make una choose for her, male or female house-keeper????
My face neva recover

85 comments:

OluwaDee said...

1st!!!!!

LG said...

yessoooo congrats babes
UP 9JA

OluwaDee said...

It depends.

I'll go for a female house help btw age 11-12.

Those male perverts are out of d question.

N no agency runz, I'll stick with grandma bringing 1 4rm d village.

LG said...

thanks dear, she go hear i.e if she still wants one *grins*

naijalines said...

Definitely female help.

LG said...

9JALINES: u sure?

Sha said...

lol lets hope dey'll bring home d gold

AlooFar said...

Those guys should be promoted to the Senior team. Straight.

LG said...

SHA: i hope so, naim make i pray make 'jedi-jedi' catch 'merci'
babes, put am 4 praya o
*grins*

ALOOFAA: u can say dat again bro,
demz too 'mush'
*howz wrk??

isha said...

Chai! PPle no get work? O'Dee instead of you to go and get married, you're firsting up and down. lol.
Yes it's chooking me. lol.

isha said...

LOL! God protect us o.

I think a female househelp is better. If she is older like 25+, it's likely that her brain is fully developed, so you can trust her with a lot more stuff around the house + your kids. I can help but think of child-abuse when it comes to younger maids.

The only problem with older ones is that most times if they know that they're only a little younger or about the same age as the madam, they can start to prove stubborn.

Am kinda already getting used to the American way of life w/o maids.

Sprezatura said...

great feeling, watching the game, watched part of the game at a bank and made plenty of enemies when the 3rd goal went in, but i no send i screamed and almost lost a lung.

On the House help thing, cant help you o

ibiluv said...

kai
she slap u
pele paddy mi

female house help but invest in CCTV.........

LG said...

ISHA: Babes wat ur own wit o'dee, or u dey jealous??? *bats lashes*
lol
as per the house-help thingy; u suggest 25yrs old??? haba!!! my friend don marry o as in, she get 'husband' as in the spirit can be ...*coughs* as in 25yrs old na
temptation no marrer how dirty/stubborn she dey (wide grin) i reject it o, but i go relate wit her, thanks
howz mummy??


SPREZATURA: i like ur name, tho' not sure i can pronounce it,
n yesss!! we did it n isha allah, we ll do it again on sat.
just take it easy on d lungs till then *grins*
up 9ja!!!!
take kia


IBILUV: babes nnor be slap o, na remote, as in tv.remote control
(u dey laff ????)
i nor blame her sha, na reflex action,*winks*
lollllllll @ CCTV, i like ....

Ms.O said...

ahh this sint fair!!! I WAS STALKING HER SINCE MORNING!!! SNIFF SNIFF

LG said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ms.O said...

Hiss I am done vexing!! Omo..u let persin slap u...kai kai kai..I no fit laugh men.. ehem ehem.. On the issue, Ill say female between the ages of 14-17. and from an agency. Because that means they are used to money and wont allow all them uncles or even the hubby that end up chasing them, use money as bait. But even better let mumsi bring you one of your distant cousins from the village and Very importantly..please have camera's in your house. am too paranoid about the molestation issue...

On to the game!! Gurl I woke up at 4am to watch this game!!1 I am soo hyper right now!! I am at work..and am soo sleepy!1 But I am very proud of the Dream Team!!! we are relivign hsitory..Atlanta 96 replay!!!
My 2 kobos!!

aloted said...

me i no get answer o..lol

@oluwadee- 11-12 ke..is that not child abuse..lol

Jarrai said...

Well done to the nigerian team...hoorah!!!

Lg...see how you scared the poor girl hehehehehe.

I will just get a good help with plenty referees....i will scan the person and find out about them indepth before i let them in my house or family

Whether male/female, if someone is bad...they are bad!!!

If she is so worried, install cctv in a teddy bear and strategically place in the house...saw it on tv lol lol!!!....thought it was so funny..

mizchif said...

Mmmmmeeeeeeeee! See as u get free of charge face lift.

Hmmmm, CCTV will just have to be theway to go. I'll favour an agency, cuz those distant relations can turn to ur worst nightmare. They start having expectations that u shd send them to sch and feed the rest of their family in the village!

Kin'shar said...

I dont know half of the things you started in your postings.....lol...but how are you?

Kin'shar said...

English please.......thanks sweets!

doll said...

LMAO. this whole house help thing is male or female is with the grace of God honestly

rethots said...

...and everyone goes feminine???

LG said...

MS O: haba!!! dem give me face-lift u dey laff?, no worry i go catch u 4 corner ...*winks*
n yesso dos bois gats to bring home d cup o, dats d only gold i want.


ALOTED: iyawo dats not accepted o, my friend nids ur advise n no fear, she cant face-lift u 4rm here *grins*


JARRAI: o gal, na my fault???? or nor be she ask for my opinion???
*as per cctv, chei!! i nor kno say we get plenti 007 for blogville o, 1st ib, now u?? lollllll


MIZCHIF: oh! oh! oh! so na Mmmee
u go tell me, *sigh* now i kno my enemies, lolllll
how r u doing?????

LG said...

KINSHAR: haba!!! babes, i had always tot u were one of us....as in omo-9ja
lollll
but d thing u r asking for is ......
*scratches chin* .....EASY *grins*
i ll wrk on it or beta stil, dont u have any 9ja friends dat can do d translation..... cos i lurveeeeee dis
my 'style' o *bats lashes*


DOLL: swerri, thank you jare! Now!! why didnt i tell her dat
*scratches head* at least my face for still ......
lollllllllll

RETHOTS: hehehehehehe Wat abt u
mr/mrs vacationer, or are u back??

simeoneomobaba said...

u know..i just finished reading that ur news alert and nigeria scored the first goal....i hope we dont conceed any penalties to those .....argentines..so hopefully we can i have gold medal..lets celebrate..

Afrobabe said...

you see my position after enough stalking???

Dee! said...

O LG why do you always update when I am not readily available? Hmmmmm?

The issue of house help is one I do NOT joke with at all! In your friends' case, since she has a girl child, it is "safer" to have a female house help. She should not go for a teenager o! Like I said these are safe measures! My first help was indeed God sent. I wished I could keep her on but she had to move on...She got married and I had to let her go. For subsequent ones I kept looking for her qualities in them, but no luck! Anyway I'll stick to the females.

PS: Like I tell all my friends - try not to be unnecessary mean to your helps. Do not descriminate! I wish her well in her search.

Afrobabe said...

Lmao..pray tell me she didn’t really slap u…that house help matter I no even know again oh…so I shall take a seat and listen to the seasoned veterans in the house…

LG said...

SIMEON: omobaba where's ur faith????
we gats to win dat gold o, cos 4 me dats wat matters in d olympics (as our oda teams didnt get 4 der finals)
9ja must bring home the cup!!.


AFRO: Babe 4 ur case, na siddon look i dey, cos i kno say 'sumn rung'
haba!!! u wey dey carry 1sttttttt b4 now na 'kpo' be ur name, berra
go check yasef o, *wide grin*


DEE: (goes closer to dee's ear)
no worry next time *grins*
but dearie, u lucky o,sotey i wanted to keep her!, nows dats a miracle, i wish i can say d same 4 odas..... *sigh*

AFRO: thank God nor be slap,
na tv.remote she use 'stone me'
lolll no mind d yeye gurl jor.

* no wahala, oya go carry 'joko'

geisha.song. said...

lol.. pele your face will recover sho gbo, but she won't! ultimately tho, beta a cheating husband than a molested daughter. even tho i hear women do the molesting in some cases...

geisha.song. said...

lol.. pele your face will recover sho gbo, but she won't! ultimately tho, beta a cheating husband than a molested daughter. even tho i hear women do the molesting in some cases...

LG said...

GEISHA: thank hun, d swelling is gradually reducing,
@women molesting kids, i m hearing dis 4 d first time, why??? wld they do dat??? Now who can we trust wit our kids *soft sigh*

Esmeralda said...

eeya, pele o LG my business partner, why ur friend come give u face-lift na? no be true u talk?

personally i dont even want to contemplate the househelp thing now,i'll wait till the time comes jare.

congrats to naija, i've not been watching the olympics jare.

Mz. Dee said...

lmao @ ur response... u be craze woman!!


i de go ask Sting to enroll u 4 her kolomental hospital!!

LG said...

ESMERALDA: lollll padi me, no mind d scoin-scoin gal jare, she ask question n i give her answer *winks*
n remember the 'dream team' for ya prayas o, they gats to win argentina o.
*how bodi?? n wrk??


MZ.DEE: che!!!! if i catchhhhhhh u!!!
*wide grin*

(¯`·._.·[***Fresh&Fab***]·._.·´¯) said...

i cant wait to watch niaja beat Argentina again 96 final repeat

Naija Idol said...

ur osase... hell no oo. na my odemnwigie be dat ooo.

Ur friend should go for a female househelp ooo.

Lmao@ ur response. u too bad! but na d truth sha..

Btw, long time no c,how u dey???

Naija Idol said...

i nor even watch d match sef.

Naija Idol said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
LG said...

FRESH N FAB: yesso history HAS to repeat itsef ni' haba!! we ve come dis far na, at least make dem nor laff say upon all our bragging a whole 9ja go olympic without winning one gold. *giggles*
we must win o.


9JAIDOL: babe,if na play abeg stop am! look my face, u see 'laff', so berra correct yasef now or ......
(wide grin)
hmm!! so u too choose female-help,
no wahala but wen g-string jam g-string, i go run come call all of una o, lolllllllllllllllllllll

*i full ground brekete, thanks.
how far u don update???????

Writefreak said...

see how my comment went and missed...chei see wetin blogger don do me!

Yes congrats to naija on the match ,,though i no dey waste my time to watch...!

And as per the househelp issue, it's a serious palava o, me i have almost decided never to have one just that sometimes they're a necessary evil..one needs to watch and pray before employing one, i've heard several stories of abuse, even seen one!

So did your friend really slap you? abi you just dey exaggerate???

LG said...

WRITEFREAK: haba iyawo!! why u wan fall my hand??? *sigh*
newyaz, no be slap she slap me, na tv.remote she 'stone' me (she claims it was reflex) but if u no believe me, oya look....see my face HERE
*evil grin*


BTW: y u nor watch the match?? *hiss*
u r a fake 9gerian.
lollllllll

Chari said...

na wa o!

serious facelift be that one o!
mehn...I dunno jus get a gay househelp...

LG said...

CHARI: buahahahahahahahahahaha
o boi, come take her 4one number and her address go tell her by ursef, lol
dis chari u ve definitely LOST IT.
yeye boi *hiss*

Writefreak said...

Hehehe...me i no just dey like the kain heart attack wey football fit give person ni jare...i be correct naija babe!
I no see your face o!

LG said...

WRITEFREAK: haba heart attack ke?? God forbid, but then iyawo u kno u r a sweet thirteen na *giggles*
ehen u say u nor see my face-lift, oya see the link AGAIN (beta luck dis time) lolllll

Standtall said...

We won ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo we gonna make the final. We r d winner.

I may be back to answer the second complicated issue....

LG said...

STANDTALL: swerri nawa 4 o, i don even conclude say , 'u don go beijin go celebrate with d bois' (giggles)


How far na? werrin dey? u don update?
How r 'my' kittens????? *winks*
Cheers!!!!!

Standtall said...

Yes, o was in Beijin yesterday. Just got back.

All the 4 kittens are adopted o. by good and fine fine pple papa. It remains the rest 4 yet to be weaned.

We are fine my love. What of u?

LG said...

STANDALL: ehen i for say!! no wonder i dey try ur number wen match finish to no avail,
soooo u go china ehn?? but why u come back? u 4 kukuma stay there watch d 'finals' na (grins)
anyway since u don come back, wellycome o, and werin u bring for me??? i no wan hear say sumn do sumn o (winks)



*i full ground brekete, thanx luv*

Standtall said...

U no fit chop Chinese food o. cos na wetin I bring come be that. I try for my pidgin?

rayo said...

mmmeeeeehhhhhnnnnnn, hope ur face dint smart too much, jeez, what kinda illustrations were those? but they wir hilarious sha

LG said...

STANDTALL: buahahahahahahahaha my baby's coming up (grins) u try jare, its not eazy
come 'chop' knuckles first, ko eazy ra ra.
N i sabi chop chinese o, my fav is dat their fried 'akor'(prawn/crab)
i no remember d name dem dey call am.
make i come collect am.....


RAYO: ahh! my sistah no be small thing o, if not 4 my 'instinct'
e for pass 'be careful o'
How ur side??? exams nko???

Aphrodite said...

lol...
Whether lionel Messi contract jedi-jedi or not we are carrying that cup, na me talk am.

That househelp thing be as e get sha. How person wan do na? na to employ 'agadi nwanyi'(elderly woman) be the solution o.

FineBoy Agbero said...

ah LG, i no 4give u o!
1. You did not give me expo...
2. You posted on my bday...
3. You posted at a tym when i was at home and available..
4. Upon all u did not give me expo!!!

Anyway sha, why ur friend no break coke bottle for ya head? See d nonsense u dey talk to her abt her hubby and her pikin? U wicked o!

Anyway sha, how u dey?

James Tubman said...

africa definately represented in the olympics this year

the us hegemony is over lol

badderchic said...

HOW NAAAAAA 58 comments? Im off to cry!

Buttercup said...

hahahahahahahahaha! OMG lg, u don kolo!!!!

*repeats after lg* we too mush!

lollll how she no go give u gbaun with the pictures u painted??? loll gosh i cant stop laughin...hahahahahahhaahhaa!!!!

*calms down*

i'll suggest a woman in her 40s or somn who comes daily instead of livin in, to clean n cook or whatever..

btw thanx for checkin on me..how u dey??

Free-flowing Florida said...

dis gal, u r crazy, u know. hahahahahahahaha.

pele oh. but seriously, dat housemaid thing na serious issue o

Standtall said...

Dont worry mi-lady, one of my kittens will bring the Chinese food come ur house. I no wait 4 finals cos of a pressing isue wey no fit wait. No p, I fii go back 2mrw 4 d finals sef.

Make my kitten bring the food?

LG said...

APHRODITE: yesso prophetess aphroditehas said it n so shall it be .....WE GO WIN!!!! (wide grin)
*ehen as per the 'elderly woman ', i ve noticed dat kids tend to be scared of dem n they might not be too agile to do sum stuff in d house, neways i go tell her.


FINE-BOI-AGBERO: ahhhh padi mi, ma binu jor, u nor tel me na!!
abeg (LG prostrates) nor vex 4 me.
****HAPPY BELATED BAFFDAY*****
double twale!! May God continue to guide, protect, bless, flourish, increase, multiply ur....ur....(complete am jor) (giggles)
enjoy!!! norrin do u !!!


JAMES TUBMAN: yessooooooooo, thanks bro, Change has to Change!!!
Hope u r gud.


BADDERCHIC: sowwwwwy hon, at d time of going to blog-press, i tried to reach u to no avail,
oya take hanky, clean ya face
(grins)
no worry dear, d next post nor go pass u.

LG said...

BURRERCUP: lolllll but swerri,how i take kolo, or nor be answer i give her? (winks)
BTW e nor go easy to see 40yrs old wey go gree do house-help wrk, dem fit even slap u if u send message sef *grins*
but i go relate with her sha, tanks
*mowapa, wat abt u????


FFF: *loud hiss* afta u don laff ur belle full, u come dey say pele, pele to u too (grins)
berra just make sure say u support 9ja on saturday o.
*o'lu kwanu?


STANDTALL: no wahala!! me too go traful 2mrw evening go Beijing, i gats to join d supporter's club sharpish,dois bois must hear LG voice o (grins),
so,if u don make up ur mind to go, jam me 4 int.airport (wider grin)
argentina doesn't stand a chance at all (isha allah)
*as per d chinese, who u wan send bring am???????? if na garfied, make sure say u wear am fine clothes o (giggles)

Standtall said...

Yes, we fiii jam for the airport

Na Molly Pikin go bring am. She don get fine fine clothes already. She wants to wear fine one to Aunty LG's place.

LG said...

STANDTALL: buahahahahahahahahaha
(i sure say u dey house)
No wahala, if na Molly dey come, make she wear halterneck/ 3/4 trosiz / peep-toe shooz/ n handbag n ....
(giggles uncontrollably)

Standtall said...

I say na Molly PIKIN. She is so cute. I will give her money to go n shop for the kind of designer u described when I get home. In fact nat the 4 pikin go come sef (***wink***)

Buttercup said...

hahahahaha!

i dey o...

take care!

Jinta said...

i like your friend

you missed out a third option. your friend gets akpan and her husband catches them together

LG said...

STANDATALL: sweeri, i don dey fear o, till now molly neva reach my house, u sure say moto neva ....
sorry, sure say she neva lost?????
abeg try her GSM sharp sharp,
*widest grin*


BURRERCUP:i'm soooo happy, u r happy :)
IT IS WELL!!!!


JINTA: sheje!!!!!!!! *grins*
as per the 3rd option, oya come take her GSM, make u tel her by yasef, shior!!!
4 ur information, i trus...*coughs*
my friend. *giggles*
jinta lef me hand o



how ya side?????

Uzezi said...

no 71.not bad. naija will win the gold medal.

that house help thing is scarry, but we can only trust God to keep our children safe from all evil.

female helps when younger are better, but then u think of child abuse. my cuz has a 13 yr old that is even short. when she misbehaves, i remind myself she is my kid sis age mate and i just do what i have to.

Buttercup said...

awwww thanx luv!

*hugs*

chi-grace said...

Rubbish.....
You for slap am back joo, but LG, did she really give you dat face-lift?

For me ooo, I want a 60 yr old and above woman with one tooth and no hair!!

badderchic said...

alright o! i hearrr you. I trust you will inform me atleast 72 hrs before lol.

LG said...

UZEZI: yaay anoda soccer-prophetess in the house!!! *giggles*
we go win, no shaking!!!
*true talk, only God can protect our home, esp 4rm d hands of 'our helps'.


BURRERCUP: same here hon :) be gud now,


CHIGRACE: 4 real babes, but d swelling had reduced sha, tanx.
*u say u want 60yrs old with one tooth n no hair;naim be say na u go be d house-help o, *wide grin*
*how u???

BADDERCHIC: hehehehe no wahala, but then u kno, i must update after
d 'finals' n it ll be live 4rm beijin, so u berra not miss it.
*winks*

DB said...

I don't like the idea of house helps. Not at all? Daily cleaning 'woman', fine.
My female best friend these days and I had our major fight because I couldn't help but just express my distaste. She keeps bringing them in one after the other and she has had like over a dozen since she got married six years ago.
I think she shuld just employ regular mature help.
Under age house help is like child labour you know and its against international law. If its your own child you are getting to pound fufu, wash oga clothes, iron bombom boy's socks and pants, fine.
One old lady said it better, 'why not train your own child instead of training another man's child'
abi house help no be human being born am?
You wuld always have problems wit maid no matter how nice you are. Either you or your kids or even your husband.
House girl, forget it.
BTW, LG, Thanks for letting me post on your blog. lol.

Standtall said...

DB has said it all. She has put everything in a right perspective as I would have loved tooooooooo

shalewa said...

what happened to my comment?

aloted said...

yes I totally agree with DB and Standtall..i am not a fan of maids..we didnt have maids ..my mum made us do everything..am sure your friend can survive..and if she really needs help she shld get someone that comes in but doesnt live with her..

i don answer now o! lol

Uzezi said...

so the update is in o

Allied said...

No housekeepers jo. we always had at least 2 while I was in Naija, but thinking about it now, those girls were my age or a little older then me. It is not cool jare. I will feel uneasy about having one.

But I do realize some people need help more than others – I will suggest she just hire someone- a much older lady like 45, to help her with the chores but she is not to live in her house

princesa said...

81 comments and i cant find mine!!!
I no know u and afrobabe, who popular pass now,lol!

Anyway, i don soak my rosary for water since, nothing do my boys, dem go make us proud tomorrow.

I hope say ur face don come down now.
Meanwhile why i no dey see u for msger na abi na invincible woman u don turn to?lol!

Dammy said...

I am thinking...this one is a hard nut to crack!

Hmmm...she could get a robot to do the job. Afteral a robot does not wear G-string! LOL...

Did that help?

How u dey?

QMoney said...

to get househelp neva turn waec like dat now?she can get a small girl and have an older nanny come in daily i think...

rebecca said...

The Daffodils

(1)

I wander'd lonely as a cloud

That floats on high o'er vales and hills,

When all at once I saw a crowd,

A host of golden daffodils,

Beside the lake, beneath the trees,

Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.
(2)

Continuous as the stars that shine

And twinkle on the milky way,

They stretch'd in never-ending line

Along the margin of a bay:

Ten thousand saw I at a glance

Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.
(3)

The waves beside them danced, but they

Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:

A poet could not but be gay

In such a jocund company!

I gazed --- and gazed --- but little thought

What wealth the show to me had brought;

(4)

For oft, when on my couch I lie

In vacant or in pensive mood,

They flash upon that inward eye

Which is the bliss of solitude;

And then my heart with pleasure fills,

And dances with the daffodils.

~~~by maple story mesos